Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
