Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(517): View more from Michigan

careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus

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(248): View more from Michigan

just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy

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(916): View more from California

Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice

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(707): View more from California

he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"

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(432): View more from Texas

then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.

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(+61): View more from Australia

She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.

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(419): View more from Ohio

I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!

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(256): View more from Alabama

Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night

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