Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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