My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
We're using joints as your birthday candles
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
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