Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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