she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
i out mim tonsoeep
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