Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Randomize
