In the future we'll all be gay
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
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