Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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