I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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