if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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