every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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