She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Randomize
