I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
This is the high leading the old right now
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
