She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
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