Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
