mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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