I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
