We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
