If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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