Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
