I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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