Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
