Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(954): View more from Florida

youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.

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(559): View more from California

my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.

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(334): View more from Alabama

Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"

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(906): View more from Michigan

Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.

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(708): View more from Illinois

You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.

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(305): View more from Florida

is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?

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