3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Randomize
