Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
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