We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
