Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Randomize
