The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
