You really coming over, don't trick.
Yo dont text me then not text me
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
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