yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
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