i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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