I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
