covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
