Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
