how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
