we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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