I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
