fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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