Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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