Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
