32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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