i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
