I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Randomize
