in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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