OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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