there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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