those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Randomize