you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
why do cheetos always look like penises
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
