But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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