I think I just saw someone hide a body.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
