If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize